My Story

Lilisitititita brownI was brilliant!

I was a little girl that scaped the playpen every single time she was put in it. Now I know that a playpen in Dutch is box. Gosh! What a prediction was that!

Were `they` able to tame me. Yes and no.

I had inumerable primary sensations (term coined by Joseph Chilton Pearse for Extra Sensory Perceptions). I saw walking around people who were already dead. I saw how other people would die. BUT I didn’t feel safe talking about this with anyone. I suppresed it. I ignored it. Until I manage to reduce these experiences to almost cero.

I was tamed. I went to catholic school. But at dinner table I was allowed out of that box. I was taken into the wisdom of the cosmology of my ancestor: The Aztecs, The Toltecs. I grew up with mass on thursday and sunday morning AND Coatlicue in my heart, in my veins.

I was tamed. I went to university. I hang up two university tittles. One in management of technology and the other in international business. I chose for both of course because I was tamed, because I would make money with them. Thinking about what I loved was completely out of the question. My heart was shouting for art: painting, interior design, architecture, clothes design, filmography… Yes, I was tamed.

IMG_0902I was tamed. I climbed the corporate ladder. I accumulated more than 20 years of business experience, specialized in Change Management, working for large corporations, start ups, research institutions, managing millions of Euros and dozens of people around the world . I worked in Mexico, Brazil, Costa Rica, US, Germany, Greece, Italy, UK, the Netherlands, Belgium, France… in English, Spanish and Dutch. And all these did not make me happy. I mean happy in a profound way. I felt like I put my inner child locked in a high security prison, well just a golden cage.

BUT

One day I had to scape. I couldn’t stay in tha box anymore. I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror. I became so different from what my inner child wanted to become. My boy, mind and spirit were broken. I quit the corporate world for good. I scaped this box.

But I was still tamed. I entered another box. I enter the world of entreprenuership. I believed that I was free then, but I was still a prisioner of my expectations, of my desire for recognition, fame, success.

What was the game changer?

In one word: love.

After I left the coprate world, I was living in the world of uncertainty and freedom. With freedom came the space to meet an amazing man, Bertil Schaart.

He went trough a very similar journey and at the same time as I. We both quit the corporate world in the same week, the week before we met. That created a friendship bond that rapidly developed into profound true love. This was and is the greatest miracle of my life. I went so far away from my inner child, that I trully believe that I would never be loved. I believed love was trully impossible for me.

This miracle was the beginning of a roller coaster of profound spiritual events that lead me to open this website.

I became a mother twice. First of a boy and second of a girl.

I couldn´t stay in the box. I cannot. I´ve scaped one box after the other. And now I hope to be free of all boxes and free of all scaping.